Monday, March 28, 2011

'Why Am I Doing This?' or #100factsaboutme

All of my Twitter friends are doing this #100factsaboutme hashtag, so I figured I might as well try it, too. Not often you get to post this amount of honesty, I guess.

Whatever. Here goes nothing:

1. My favorite music is punk rock, but I always hesitate to tell people that.

2. My four favorite bands are Rise Against, Thrice, Bad Religion and Streetlight Manifesto. They all tie for first.

3. I just decided to write a blog out of fact #1.

4. I sing and play guitar for a punk rock band named Golf Course Kamikaze.

5. My best friend Henry Steele is GCK's drummer, and he leaves for basic training today.

6. But, in his last few weeks here, we played a kickass basement show, gathered all our friends for a movie night, and fought together in an awesome airsoft war.

7. I have to keep reminding myself that I'll see him again in June, or sometime around then.

8. I have a hard time opening up to other people. I like to tell myself it's because I have an independent nature, but I know it's mostly because I suck at socializing.

9. Ironically, I feel like I have a good stage presence.

10. I can't believe I'm seriously doing a #100factsaboutme.

11. By definition, I am an atheist, but I consider myself more of a Humanist.

12. My family raised me as a Christian, taking my family to several churches since we've lived out here in Missouri.

13. (For clarity, I was born in Virginia in 1991, and my family moved to Missouri in 1992.)

14. To this day, I still feel at home in the Arcadia Valley United Methodist Church, for the most part.

15. I don't know exactly when I stopped believing in God, but I know for certain I was an atheist by the middle of my sophomore year.

16. Funnily enough, I can vividly remember the first time I ever heard the word atheist.

17. 'Funnily enough' is one of my favorite expressions.

18. I'm flipping through Emily Gallaher's 100 Facts blog while typing my own.

19. Unrelated, I very much adore the ocean, and whales are my second-favorite animals.

20. The mink is my first favorite animal, a fact due entirely to a dream I had where several baby mink invaded my Honors English 3 classroom (and yes, the plural of mink is mink, not minks. I checked).

21. Ask me about my subtle knife dream.

22. Don't ask me about my subtle knife dream.

23. My favorite book is Catch-22. I read it my sophomore year after my mom had bought it for me on a whim. My first thought after reading the description on the back was, Wow Mom, thanks for getting me some cheap book I'll probably hate.

24. I want to be a writer.

25. However, the thought of writing an entire novel seems impossible to me right now. I'd rather stick with short stories and poetry. For now.

26. Speaking of poetry, I fell in love with it my junior year of high school. I was really into Walt Whitman and Langston Hughes.

27. I like incorporating poetry into my songwriting. It's a technique I picked up from Thrice's songs.

28. It just hit me that both poets in #26 were gay. O.O

29. Moving on, I'm not very film savvy at all. There are just so many movies I haven't seen.

30. These movies include Lord of the Rings (all three), The Hangover, Rocky, and many others. Seriously, name some movie that you think EVERYONE has seen, and I probably haven't seen it.

31. If I have a favorite movie, it's probably The Mask. And Jim Carrey is probably my favorite actor, too. And after re-watching the movie a week ago, I found out that it was Cameron Diaz's film debut.

32. I plan on using the previous sentence as my one bit of movie trivia.

33. I feel like I have a confusing set of siblings. If you didn't know, let me clear it up: I have two younger brothers, Matt and Joey, who are fraternal twins, and an older brother Philip.

35. I am roughly seven years younger than Philip and about a year and three months older than Matt and Joey.

36. I feel so lucky to have such loving parents. I rarely ever fight with them, and never do I feel like they don't give a shit about me or my brothers.

37. That's why it makes me sad for my friends who have difficult home lives. I feel guilty because it's like all I had to do get a stable, supportive family was get born.

38. I have a lot of issues like that, where I feel like I don't deserve half the fortunes I have, or that I'm too pathetic to deserve any more fortunes sometimes.

39. This number reminds me of the summer I went to New York for a week with my school's art club and we saw a Broadway production of The 39 Steps. That play was hilarious, and I'm super excited that Chuck is planning on directing it this Fall.

40. Also while in New York that year, I made friends with several kids from a school in Oregon. I miss them so much, and I want to visit them so bad someday.

41. My mom was born and raised in New York, and her immediate family still lives there. I get to visit my grandparents there every couple of years.

42. My mom's parents are the only grandparents I have. My dad's parents were both dead before my memory.

43. Actually, I visited my grandparents in New York during the summer of 2001, and even saw the Twin Towers before they were made historic.

44. I want to finish these facts before I go to sleep, but I really don't want to stay up this late...

45. I fell asleep after typing that last fact. It was about 1:15.

46. I like Twitter more than Facebook.

47. Whenever I curse on Twitter, I always wonder how my followers react, or at least my super Christian followers. It feels like I'm breaking some sort of taboo.

48. And now that both my parents are on Facebook (as well as some of my friends' parents), I never curse.

49. And yeah, I like calling them curse words instead of cuss words. Cuss just sounds too hillbilly to me.

50. I've never been drunk before, but I have had alcohol on several occasions.

51. Pajama jeans. Laugh all you want, I own a pair. Wore them in public once, and that's only because it was pajama day at MAC.

52. Dancing used to seem really stupid to me, but I'm starting to actually like it.

53. I'm just gonna go ahead and say it: I like Pokemon.

54. I used to be a fairly avid video gamer, but now I just don't have the time for video games. And that makes me sad.

55. It feels like I don't have time for anything but school anymore. Which makes me even more sad.

56. I first started playing bass guitar in eighth grade when my friend Brett Lester wanted to start a band. That band didn't pan out, haha.

57. A year later, I picked up my mom's acoustic guitar and I've been playing guitar ever since.

58. I was actually in a heavy metal band with Brett later in high school, after I actually got some skill with a guitar.

59. Honestly, I didn't really like metal back then, and I still don't today. It's not that I can't handle the screaming or heaviness, I just prefer punk rock.

60. I want to go into more detail about that, but I'll save it for the blog I promised in fact #3.

61. As of right now, the only person following me with their Blogger account is Deacon Seals, which I do appreciate. To the rest of you: thanks, jerks.

62. Sometimes I get jealous of my friends, simply because they live in a more social environment.

63. More specifically, I sometimes get jealous of my friends living in Park Hills, since they live so close to each other.

64. On a brighter note, I might be getting an apartment in Park Hills or Farmington or Bonne Terre, which will narrow that gap between me and all my friends in that area.

65. I can't believe I've actually gotten this far on the list without saying, "This is stupid, I quit."

66. Anything aimed specifically at teenagers--especially teens in love--annoys the sweet living crap out of me.

67. Until going to the Elmhurst Jazz Festival last month, I didn't fully appreciate jazz music. I think it was Matt Wilson's Arts & Crafts that changed my perception of jazz.

68. Now, I really do love jazz music, and I enjoy playing my saxophone, trying to find a oneness with it.

69 <-- I want to try that someday.

70. I feel slightly uncomfortable revealing that last fact.

71. I want to overcome my hesitation and indecisiveness.

72. The most fun I ever had acting in a play was my junior year when my school did The Good Doctor. Darn them horseflies.

73. I used to really suck at singing, but I feel like I've definitely gotten better over the years. The first time I knew I had some merit as a singer was when Mrs. Beard cast me as Seymour for Little Shop of Horrors.

74. As much as I loved being the lead in Little Shop, I still think I had more fun in the The Good Doctor.

75. One of my favorite characters I've ever portrayed in a play was Walter Mitty in A Thurber Carnival.

76. I don't really like popular music, and that makes me feel like a hipster, indie-kid bastard at times.

77. If I ever have the time, I would love to become a painter.

78. But, I already feel like I'm stretched too thin with writing, music, and theater.

79. I don't watch as much TV as I used to. I spend more of my time on the Internet now.

80. If I had to pick a favorite TV show, it's either Family Guy or The Office.

81. I even used to keep up with American Idol, but stopped watching it after about season 4 or 5.

82. I act out conversations in my head all the time. I try to imagine how I should say something, and how other people would respond.

83. I catch myself talking out loud while doing that, too.

84. I like having time where I can just walk around and think. I would drive around and think, but gas is expensive.

85. Many people have told me I should straighten my hair, and a few even said they would do it for me. Not one has ever followed through.

86. I wish Joe Strummer was still alive. It kills me that he died in my lifetime, and before I even appreciated him as a musician.

87. If I ever have a son, I want to name him Zane.

88. If I ever have a daughter, I'd like to name her Autumn.

89. I don't know if I can see myself getting married. That's a far-off thing to me.

90. I hate plans. I prefer spontaneity. That being said, I realize that you can't get shit done without planning.

91. I don't think I have any phobias. If I do, I haven't discovered it yet.

92. I wish I could learn to fly a plane someday.

93. Twilight is my favorite time of day, and one of my favorite words. Thanks for ruining it, Stephenie Meyer.

94. Kingdom Hearts is my favorite video game series. And I like Roxas more than Sora.

95. When I was in first grade, I went as Ash Ketchum for Halloween. So far, that has been my favorite Halloween costume, ever.

96. Pirates > Ninjas. Bring it.

97. And dragons > vampires and werewolves combined. Edward and Jacob have nothing on Saphira.

98. Luna Lovegood is my favorite Harry Potter character. I especially love the actress they chose for her in the movies.

99. I have so many emotions attached the song Swing Life Away.

100. Wait, I'm already done?

Tuesday, March 1, 2011


We chase
different ends,
to catch different

but have we made our destinations the same?

Are we all bound
like links
on a
rusted chain,
or just cars
on a speeding
How long

until we collide with ourselves?